Kate Middleton Duchess Of Cambridge and Prince William Duke Of Cambridge

Dear Kate and Wills, 

You don’t mind me calling you Kate and Wills do you? I know you’re royalty but I just wanted to address you like normal people, rather than put you on some kind of pedestal.

Well firstly I would like to say congratulations to you both on the birth of your son, bit gutted you didn't call him Sid as I had that name in the sweepstake at work, could have won 25 quid, but hey you win some you lose some.

I hope you’re both enjoying these precious early days with your child and are getting the privacy you deserve. Mind you it’s not like the British press to intrude too much, in fact how strange is this, on the actual day of the birth there wasn't anything else happening in the world, no other news whatsoever, spooky huh? Also there was a report on the radio that you had in fact arrived at the hospital by car, now is this true because I was shocked. I know most women who are about to go into labour arrive by parachute.

This obviously wouldn't be for a couple months, but my sister has a nine month old boy and she said to ask Kate if she would like to go with her to buggy fit on a Wednesday morning at Burys Field Park in Godalming. Maybe while they're doing that Wills we can go for a Wetherspoons breakfast in town and who knows possibly a cheeky pint. Let me know.

Yours Sincerely,

O. J Trout

(The Grand Old Duke Of Godalming)