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Dear Miss Gaga,
I watched your performance the other week on the X Factor
and I have to say I was disappointed to see you had to perform in just your bra
and knickers. This wouldn't be the first time this has happened and if I were
you, I would be seriously considering getting a new wardrobe team as they keep
forgetting to bring your outfit with them and poor you has to go out and sing
with just your underwear on. I mean what are they getting paid for if they
can’t do a simple job like this, it does no favours to your dignity whatsoever.
I know exactly how you must have felt because I had a similar experience back
in my school days when my mum forgot to pack my PE kit and I was made to do it
in just my white pants and vest, not only that but I had a bad case of the
trots as well, that was a tough day I can tell you.
Now Miss Gaga, I was wondering if you can help me, whenever
I'm playing cards with the boys once a month I can’t seem to get my poker face
right and I'm getting found out quite easily, leaving me nearly skint two days
after pay-day. Now I know you have perfected the art of the poker face as you
told everyone a few years back, so if you could possibly spare a little bit of
time to help me get mine right I would be very grateful. The other week I was
trying so hard to get it right that I left my cards upright on the table, so
embarrassing. Also if you’re not too busy maybe you can teach me how to
actually play the game as well, because to be honest Miss Gaga I don’t really
have a clue, I mean I would sound a bit of a knob if I told the boys that now
after nearly a year of playing it. Actually thinking about it maybe my poker face isn't the
problem because they don’t know I can’t play poker, they just think I'm really
shit. How foolish are they!!
Bye
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